Awkward Words

Awkward things happen to me. All the time. I know that it's only awkward if you make it awkward, but honestly, I find most things to be awkward. In fact, I should just find some synonyms  for the word so I sound like I know more than one word.

Awkward:

blundering
graceless
uncomfortable
incompetent
oafish
 klutzy
 uncouth
unpolished
unrefined

& my favourite...

 inelegant.

I will have to work on using more of these words instead of awkward. Now that we have that out of the way, why is my life awkward? Well, I don't do well with people and my friend ditching me while with a guy well that leads to incompetent conversation and a lot of head nodding. Also, this leads to super uncomfortable things being said. Enough said? I think so.

This is going all over the place as usual but I will give you a life update.

School is fine, English is my favourite class even though it can be boring at times. I really like it, and I like my teacher and the assignments are fine. I am passing Biology, which is somewhat a shock, and surprisingly it is not my worst grade. Humanities is killing me. I love reading but honestly I could care less about Pluto and many of the other readings we have done for the class.  Psychology is going as well as expected, I have a hard time with some of the teachings in that class (and bio) but it can be entertaining. My human development class is fine, its easy and I have found myself slacking off more in that class than any other class.

Church is good too, I still really like my calling in the institute committee and I still make treats every Tuesday night for institute. I love it, except for the attention and compliments. I would rather remain anonymous, because I never know what to say to people when they compliment me or how to act. I can be very graceless when people give me praise.

Home is good, my family is all here except for dad and Zach and all is well on that front except for the fact we all have colds and they are getting passed around. Sigh, What can you do?

That's all. I have an hour before my next class and I am in a good part in my book so I am going to read. TTYL.

Bad Hair Days

Its been a while since I've written. I haven't wanted to write in a long time, but as I am sitting here in the library, I think it's time to start writing again.

In case you missed the news, it's 2015.

The year so far has been crazy, with so many new things happening. I feel like I've really had to get out of my comfort zone in this past month, and while I still like to stay within my bubble I feel like I am growing and flourishing and honestly it scares me just a little bit.

I go to a singles ward. I always swore I would never do it but I decided this past summer to give it a chance and I am happily surprised by how much I am liking it.

I have a calling, in the stake institute committee, I love it. I love the institute and seminary programs, and I like how it isn't as big as on the USU campus. The small group setting works well for me.

I started classes at USU and that just a big bowl of melancholy.  I like being back in school, I like learning and I've missed that in the past year- but getting back into it is harder than I thought it would be. I have five classes. There are a few of them that I really like, and a few I wish I could do without, but life would be too easy if I liked all my classes. And we wouldn't want my life to be too easy now.

I'm trying to think of other things that are new. I have a friend. Actually I have friends. Plural, as in many. Or a few. Still more than one, which is exceptionally well for the girl who wouldn't talk to the cafeteria ladies for the first year of high school. 

I think that's all that's new within the last few months...

And now on to my title (yes, it actually has a point to it). I am having a bad hair day; a sign I am taking as an omen to mean the whole day is going to be bad. Already I have had one exam, and I am pretty sure I didn't do so hot on that, and now I am sitting in the library freezing because me being me I didn't bring a jacket, just my light hoodie.

You are probably thinking that this cant possibly be that bad. It is. Well it FEELS that bad. I am sure it can't possibly be that bad, except that my hair really is that bad. My hair looks like I've been living in the jungle for weeks: sleeping on the ground,  running wildly through trees, and having heart attacks every time I see bugs or snakes. No lie. But I was running late this morning even through I was actually super early to class (don't ask) and I really just didn't want to deal with it so I threw a headband in my hair and have decided to avoid mirrors for the entire day, which so far has not been successful, but I am working on it.

This shouldn't be a surprise, I've been waiting for this to happen. Sunday and Monday were just too good of days and I was super happy and I knew it couldn't possibly last a third day. That would have just been too easy, and as I've said, we wouldn't possibly want my life to be easy. 

And now I am just being really dramatic.

 Smile 

It'll be fine.

It always is.

[:

Beautiful

I have had a lot of problems with my self image. Doubts would come to mind when looking in the mirror and I would wonder why I couldn't be pretty. Over the past years, that view has changed. I have changed the way I see myself, and the way others see me. It doesn't mean I don't still have bad mornings, where nothing fits and I feel like the ugliest girl in the world. The truth is, I realized that there are much more important things than the way you look, dress, or style your hair. 

It helped being pulled out of school and doing online classes. Ten years of being bullied by my peers had left a mark. I found my salvation those years in books, and a lot of pretending that words and taunts didn't effect me. The one thing I can say is that being stubborn pays off sometimes. I was never willing to change myself to fit in. I didn't care what the media said or what the Barbie girls had to say- I wasn't going to do it.  Instead I looked toward heroines in my favorite stories and the qualities that made them such great characters. I stayed away from the wayward villains and the vanity of silly characters and focused on the heroine.

On a side note, there are some great books every girl should read:

• North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell
• Emma by Jane Austen
• Little Women by Luisa May Alcott
• All's Fair in Love, War, and High School by Janette Rallison
• Matilda, Ronald Dahl
• Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte.

Let me get back to the point, I have had my fair share of problems when it comes to my self image and self esteem. However, I have been working on changing that and being comfortable as me. I don't think I realized how far I have come in this until the other day.  On Facebook, two of my friends did a challenge and then challenged me to dot the same. The challenge was simple: add five (5) pictures of yourself that made you feel beautiful.  I posted these five:

 

 

 

Only in one of five of these pictures had I done my hair and makeup. In the other four pictures I was dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, no makeup, and hair down and messy. In three of the pictures I was volunteering. In one picture I was with my sister, and talking on Skype with my family. In one I was happily getting ready for the day, and cheesily dancing around my room. I wasn't posed, I wasn't dressed perfectly, and I am happy in all of them.

 

I didn't need to be in makeup, or have my hair brush to notice the beauty. Each picture has a special memory that makes me grin. None of it was planned. I was merely enjoying life.

 

I think that is true beauty. Doing things that make you smile, and enjoying yourself. Smiling, and not scowling. Loving life. Loving what you do, and what you are. Who you are. Being confident, being carefree, being loving. Who you are shows, and if it's a good quality, it adds to your beauty. It's not about makeup and hair and having the perfect clothes. It's about being a good person and having good virtues and letting that shine through. Be beautiful from the inside out, not the outside in. This goes for all you guys too.

 

Girls, you are beautiful. Guys, you are handsome. Show it, shine. Go for it.

I'm Back!

I realize it has been a long time since the last post. I do not have an excuse, I just didn't write.  Writing is a power. I didn't realize this when I started my blog years ago, then it was just a way to write out my random thoughts and day-to-day ramblings. It wasn't meaningful. But then, living in Peru for a year, I started a second blog only dedicated to life in Peru, and mostly to the orphanage. Suddenly I realized how much I could make a difference by what I wrote. I could share with others valuable lessons I learned and influence them to think outside of their day-to-day lives.

Now I am home in Utah, and I realize I am still learning things about myself and the world. Things that matter and are important to me as a human. Because being human is more about others than about myself.

I can't promise never to ramble or add stupid stuff that is pointless, because lets face it, sometimes we need silly and stupid and pointless in our lives. It balances out the responsibility we have, the darkness we face, and the  frowns we waste.  Everything has it's place, as long as there is balance.

I am 19 and loving life. I have so much to learn and so much to teach. I realize that learning includes hardships, and that's okay. I know that I need to teach others because as a person I can make a difference. I don't need to change the world to make a difference- because you never know how far one ripple will go.

So here I go.

What?

It's Monday and I am sitting here listening to Pandora. Can I say I love WiTopia and the ability to make it look like we are in the US so we can use xfinity and pandora and other really cool things.
It's days like this when I realize how many first class problems I have. Like the printer not working. I doubt half the kids in Peru even know what a printer is. 

Anyways, this didn't really have a purpose. I've been spending some time volunteering. Check it out at my other blog. justdarcie-inperu.blogspot.com

Peace,
Darcie

Twenty-Fourteen

So it's Twenty-Fourteen. Actually it's Twenty one days into Twenty-Fourteen.

Here are my highlights of 2013:

 

I graduated from Highschool. It only took three of 'em!

 

 

I graduated from Seminary. The graduation was kind of awkward, but oh well.

 

 

(This was technically at the end of 2012 but whatever)

I saw the Nutcracker for the first time in my life. It was as amazing as I imagined it to be.

 

I celebrated my 18th birthday with my dearest friend and cousin Heidi.

She turned 17 two days before so we celebrated her birthday too.

 

We moved to Lima Peru.

 

It was a HUGE change, despite living in Arequipa before.

 

We went to Orlando, Florida.

 

I saw the Blue Man Group. It was my second time and I loved it,

 I got a t-shirt out of it and some wonderful memories.

 

We did Universal studious for the first time ever. (:

 

 

I got to talk to Zachary twice on skype, on Mothers day and Christmas.

He comes home in September.

As it is now 2014 I thought I should write the 14 things I am most excited for this new year:

• University. Well.. being accepted to a university.  I have a few choices in mind and am looking forward to starting next January.


• Volunteering. I would really like to do something that profits others instead of myself before starting college and getting caught up in the world.


• Friends. I would love to see friends from Canada this year, but I am also looking forward to making new friends. I've already made a few in Peru that I think will still around, so... should be easy, right?


• Writing. I will finish my Macy Celeste story.


• Health. This year I want to be better about myself. Better learn now than when I am 40 and miserable.


• Becoming closer to God. I want to improve my relationship with God.


• Traveling. I hope to see Machu Pichu while living here, and I would also love to visit Lake Titicaca (the floating islands) and see that village on top of the mountain.


• Reading. I want to finish reading all of Jane Austen's novels as well as the rest of my reading list. Which I will get to in a minute.


• Girls night. Cousins only. Its been 6 months since I have seen my gorgeous cousin and I miss her so much, she is my best friend! I have a LONG list of fun things we are going to do this summer. It'll be awesome.


• Sugar Cookie Day. Did you know there is a national sugar cookie day? I found out last month and so, I will be celebrating it this year. It's July 9th so mark it on your calendar.


• Journal. I WILL keep up my journal writing this year.


• Hair cut. I've decided, and I have been thinking this for a while, that I need bangs. So this year when I get a hair cut (waiting for Utah, so like 6ish months) I will not be indecisive.


• New glasses. And contacts. Lets face it- I NEED new glasses, and this year I've decided that contacts would be great too. Yep, a whole new me (again- waiting for Utah)


• Utah. I've mentioned it a few times now- I can't wait to go visit Utah in the Summer. I want to see all my family and sleep in my own bed. Plus I accidently left two pairs of shoes there and would like them back.  My room *sigh* I can just imagine how I left it. I want to see all my things that I left there.

Happy Twenty-Fourteen everyone! Sorry it's twenty one days late!

Florida Part One

So, we went to nice warm sunny Florida for two weeks in November and it was pretty great.  We did Universal studios (The Wizzarding World of Harry Potter is epic) and Disney. We also h a few down day spent relaxing on the beach or by the pool.

The first day we just did some shopping at Target. We went a little overboard, being excited and all. I forgot to buy candy corn and the Christmas Hershey kisses (Santa?)

The 2nd day we did Universal Studios, We started with Harry Potter.

Words Words Words

Words are the mans greatest invention. Like Sara Bareilles says " You can turn a phrase into a weapon or a drug" You can also do some pretty amazing things with words. Even made up words, I mean, who doesn't love Dr. Seuss and his magical worlds? I love words and the power they can have. I love reading a book and feeling the hero's pain, I love cheering him or her on, laughing at their mistakes, crying at their loss. Its like being transported into another world. A magical escape from reality. Reading, I can go anywhere I want to go. The author has the talent and ability to make a world, using only ink and a pen.  I love having the power to do so, myself. I love to write knowing that inside the wall of words anything can happen. 

Speaking of words, I got bored (Obviously I need another book to read) and made some word clouds. Remind me later to get a life, huh?

Boyce Avenue and Christmas

I have discovered a new love.... Boyce Avenue.  If you haven't heard them do so now.

 

"On My Way"

 

On another note, I am homesick.Very, very, homesick.I can't help but miss my home, my stuff, my friends and family. I even miss the snow. I want a White Christmas so badly. It is just so weird that its... warm for the Holidays. I mean, Christmas in the Summer? I don't even get rain here!

 

I bet it will still be great, white Christmas or not. And I have some big plans for the new year. I've started thinking about my new year resolutions, I have quite a few of them this year.

 

Little Moments

Yesterday was beautiful day. Go check it out at Just Darcie-In Peru. I am thankful for the little moments in life, the little wonders, that make life worth living. I was thinking about life, there is so much bad out in the world, that finding the good is like treasure hunting.
It takes effort, but is worth it. The 13th Article of Faith comes to mind:

 We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul—We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

Bad things happen. But the Little Things, the moments of pure love and joy, make life worth it.

A Rather Large Bird

We

 went 

shopping

and

it 

was

crazy.

We went to the mall on Saturday,and while my mom was busy looking at table cloths or something
 in her favorite store Casa & Ideas, Marissa and I went into Saga Falabella to look for some hair clips. 

Shopping is shopping so we figured we would be okay. 

It is the most confusing, annoying process.

 Let me explain.  

There are little kiosks all over the store, with merchandise around it. 

So you choose your merchandise, and then you give it to the lady at the kiosk by it.

 She then prints you off a receipt and sends you to the Caja- the cash register. 

There you give them the receipt and pay. 

And then they give you another receipt. 

You then take your receipt back to the kiosk where they check it 

and give you your stuff along with another receipt.

So, 

by the time you are through, you have talked to several people, 

been in several lines,

 and have a dozen receipts in your pockets.

But we did see this weird but cool ostrich display by the jeans.

 And of course took a picture of tit.

Marissa didn't get the point of it, but let me take her picture anyways.

I dont know why but my shoulder looks huge and awkward in this photo. 

And it looks like I cut off all my hair because I pulled it back into a bun.

Smile (:

The Science Museum

Today Marcus had to input his two cents about my non existent love life saying: "The only one in the family who isn't going to get married is Darcie. She is the most reluctant-she doesn't even date!"

It made me smile. I am glad he see's the truth: I am going to be an old maid!

 I want to tell him that when a decent guy comes along I will start dating, but he is 

ten and likes to argue everything I say. I still love him though. 

Last Friday, so one week ago we visited a Science Museum. Calling it weird would be an understatement.

It is in a giant warehouse with the different exhibits.

This one was actually fun. You had to tip the scale just write to get the ball through the obstacle course.

And then we let Marcus get into a harness and climb...

this structure.

I don't think it's safe either.

This showed a what your muscled looked like riding a bike. 

I really like the sign; 

Drive with Care!

 There was this random Information desk so we both posed at it. 

Mom was acting like the normal bored employee 

While I posed as employee of the month. 

Marissa and Mom (:

A giant mouth. Just in case you need a lesson about what teeth are what. 

The lovely birthing process... 

for those of you who missed health class.

 And my personal favorite, the GIANT pregnant lady:

The screen in the middle of her large prego belly shows how a baby is made, 

just in case you needed a reminder of your sex education class or for those of you who slept through it. 

My reaction when I saw her: 

"What the heck is that?" followed by, Is that... ewww I don't want to see that"

Welcome to Peru!

Books, the Fall, and Vacations

It has always been my dream to publish a book. And one day I will. It's one of those goals that I know I will achieve, when the time is write. (:

I am actually really excited about the story I am working on right now, it combines three separate stories into one, and is filled with magic, romance, and heroes, both male and female.

I have been spending a lot of time trying to develop the plot and add details. I will share a bit of it when I think it's ready. Speaking of writing- I have a pen pal. She is 15 and lives in Australia, it has been a lot of fun to talk to her.We talk about everything under the sun, God included. It's actually kinda cool.

Here are some fall pictures I took last year, I can't believe it's been one year since Zach left! 

One more year on his mission and then he will be home! 

I am really sad I missed fall this year... here it  is  spring,very beginning of summer.

This first one is taken at the wall between our property and our neighbours.

I love how perfect the sky looks in it. 

The only thing is that I caught my own shadow in the painting.

This one is my favorite, It's all the things I love in one picture. 

It brings nature, country, and elegance all together. It is sophisticated, and girly, and beautiful.

I may be a bit biased though!

I was trying to include something about myself in this one. 

It brings together my love of writing, my girly side, my favorite childhood memories and paperclips.

I was trying to get a really good picture of my corsage from Prom.

I opened to the pages of Emma, and to the ridiculous poem she was given by  Mr. Elton. 

We are going on vacation in November, to Florida!
I am so excited to go, it should be a lot of fun. My grandma is coming with us, and I always love seeing her. It will be amazing. Beaches, Disney, Harry Potter, what's not to enjoy, right?

I can't stand the wait! It will be so wonderful to be in the US even for a few weeks, and I have somethings I wants, namely chocolate chips and brown sugar. But also some new movies and some clothing. I already have my Christmas list written for this year.

Marcus ate an apple!

We went out to dinner on Friday at Chilies (: 

Dad took a thousand pictures of me and Marissa and this was my favorite. I swear Marissa only has one face... 

 except for when she is eating Ribs, For being so small, she can sure eat a lot of food by herself. 

For those of you who don't know my brother, he is picky. Super picky. He eats about ten different foods and the only fruit of vegetable he will eat is corn. The other day marcus at an apple all by himself. He said, " I was watching Scooby Doo and I really wanted to try a pepper, but we didn't have one, so I tried an apple instead." Weird kid. We rewarded him with a chocolate lava cake which was heavenly. 

I hope he continues to be brave!

Thats all for now (:

I am a Mormon and General Conference

So I was helping Marcus with a school assignment this week. He had to make an I am a Mormon video. It actually turned out pretty well even though I have terrible technology skills.
Here is the link: I am a Mormon 
and if you want to learn more about the Mormon faith, here is a link:
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

General Conference took place this weekend and I was able to watch it online at home. Technology is truly an amazing blessing. To be able to participate, even in another country is amazing.

There were so many great talks, but my favorite were by Elder Dube and President Uchtdorf.
I liked that Elder Dube talked about looking forward instead of back, and I think that is something we all need to work at.

President Uchtdorf is one of my favorite all time speakers. I love his stories and his messages. 
"Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith." is a great motto and lesson. We all have doubts, and this will definitely be a quote I can count on when I question something.

Curly Hair and Maximum Ride

I spent most of the day alone at home. My parents went furniture shopping for a couch (which I am now sitting on) and my siblings are at someone's house playing. So of course I popped popcorn and sat back to watch a few chick flicks. I did my nails (cause duh! it's a girl thing) and curled my hair because you know I sometimes try to look nice. Sometimes. And then I remember why I DON'T do my hair all the time. It takes too long and the hair straightener is hot and I tend to burn myself quite a bit. And now because I am me, I always wonder why bother? Because I read a study once where guys like girls with straight hair better, so why go through the hassle if that's true?

Anyways... here was the result... nails and hair.

Ignore the silly fish face. Sorry its a selfy- I hate those. 

Sorry for going all girly girl on you... anyways...

I have been reading a new series this week. The Maximum Ride Series. I love it. If you haven't read it, go and read it now. I love Max and the "flock". Just go read it. I started on Sunday and am on the 6th book in the series. It's that awesome. I had an emotional breakdown over the 5th one though. Too much Drama and heartbreak. I obviously need a life since I get too involved with the characters... the fictional characters.

I am going to go hide in my room.. My dad started dancing... eww.

Pictures

I thought I would share some cute family photos. They are in order from newest to oldest because some are from March.  I don't have any of Zach. I will see if I can get one that he sent me up.